A collection of weird, bizarre, and sometimes useless things
Bracelet of Chains
A small wound chain bracelet that, when the command word is spoken, unravels into a 50 foot silver chain. Varients of the bracelet include ones with barbs or a morningstar on the end (indicated on the collapsed wearable bracelet by small decorative spikes or a round spiked charm).
A very fancy, but very overpriced Fabrege Egg. It is too delicate to hold anything.
Very Rare, requires attunment
These dentures are made of an old material, which appears red-brown but has too soft a texture to be made of wood. It is almost as if they made of actual gums. They are fastened together with rusty iron screws, and the teeth are replaced with sharpened fingernails. At night they clatter together with a demonic ferocity. The nails can be filed down to lessen the clacking, but regrow after 1d4 weeks.
The dentures can be thrown as a simple finesse melee weapon (range 30), and on a hit, latch onto the target, biting down and dealing 3d4 piercing damage. They can be commanded to 'gnaw' on subsequent turns, dealing an extra 1d4 piercing damage each round. The target can pry the teeth off with a successful strength save on their turn (DC 18).
Crown of the Spirit Naga
Rare Crown, Wearable
The Crown of the Spirit Naga is forged from the scales of a tormented spirit naga, ripped from its body and created while magic and life still coursed through its veins. Unfortunatly, being imbued with such magic means that the Spirit Naga still has a tie to the mortal world, and can influence those who wear the crown.
The crown has 10 charges. Charges can be expended to cast the following spells: Dominate person (5th level. Cost: 10 charges) Blight (4th level. Cost: 5 charges) Charm person (2nd level. Cost: 2 charges) Minor Illusion (Cantrip. Cost: 1 charge)
The crown regains 1d10 charges each day, to a maximum of 10. When the user drains the power of the crown, the Spirit Naga has a chance to possess the target. Whenever the charges are all expended, roll a d6. On a 6, the Spirit Naga has influence over the players actions for the next 1d10 hours (maximum until the next dawn).
The crown can be destroyed by burning it or crushing it, and doing so causes a horrible piercing scream to echo throughout a 20 foot radius, until it is completely destroyed.
Flask of Drunkenss.
Functions the same as the Flask of Plenty (below), but each liquid gets you drunk.
Flask of Plenty
This flask provides you with all the hydration you could ever need. It has 4 charges. You can expend a charge to add a single drop of liquid to the flask, and from then on, the flask will never run out of that drink. To fill it with a different liquid, you must expend another charge.
Once all the charges have been expended, roll a d4. On a 4, the charges all are regained. On a 1-3, the flask runs dry forever, and is unable to be filled with anything. Attempts to add liquid to the flask result in it turning into sand.
Glitter of Blinding
A small container of glitter that, when thrown, causes blindess to a target for 1 round. The glitter is any color, so long as it is very bright and sparkly. There is enough glitter in the container for 1d10 uses.
Gloves of Stickyfingers
These gloves belonged to a world class theif--it's said they stole something from every merchant in their city before being caught. When wearing these gloves, you have double proficency on theivery checks, but feel the compulsion of the old thief's fingers lingering. Anytime you're buying from a store or merchant, roll a d6. On an even roll, you are able to resist the compulsion. On an odd roll, you must attmept to steal something from the store or merchant.
Hat of Dyeing
When the hat is placed on the wearers head, their hair changes color, based on the chart below. This process repeats every time after a long rest. If the wearer does not have hair, there is no effect.
Lipstick of Comprehension
When worn, allows you to speak in any language of your choice for 1d6 hours. It does not allow you to understand that language. The wearer can wipe the lipstick away at anytime, but if it is removed before the 1d6 hours are up, the lipstick cannot be reapplyed again until after a long rest.
Lipstick of Silence
Perfect for a prank! When this lipstick is applied, it glues the wearers mouth shut for 1d4 hours, rendering them completely silent, as if the 'silent' spell had been cast on them alone.
The lipstick cannot be wiped away by any normal means. The effect can be broken by any spell that would remove negative effects or curses.
Rare Hankerchief, requires attunment
The hankerchief has 5 charges. When attuned to this object, the person holding it can expend a charge to make a target sneeze uncontrollably for the next minute. The target must make a constitution saving throw (DC 12) or sneeze uncontrollably for their next turn. They can make another save at the end of every turn until the effect stops.
The hankerchief regains 1d4 charges each day. If all charges are used up, the hankerchief becomes laden with snot, and can't be used for another 2 days.
Necklace of Geas
Very Rare Necklace, wearable
The Necklace of Geas is a necklace made from the bones of a Naga, bleached a pale white and inlaid with hauntingly deep green gems. The necklace has 5 charges, and when you expend one, you can enchant a creature with Geas, cast as a 5th level spell. The spell regains 1 charge per day. If the necklace runs out of charges, roll a d6. On 1-5, you cannot use the necklace again for another 24 hours. On a 6, it crumbles to dust.
Very Rare Glove
An oddly malleable jaw, with 4 tusks jutting out of it. It has been fashioned to fit the fist of a medium creature, with the spikes positioned over the knuckles. While worn, any unarmed attackes offer +1 to attack and damage, and give a 10% chance to cause bleeding in the target (1d4 slashing damage per round until any healing affect is applied).
The Nelfelshnee jaw also has 4 charges. A charge can be expended to throw the jaw at a target (range 30), and on a hit, it bites down on the target and causes 4d6 piercing damage. The jaw regains 1d4 charges each day. Should all the charges be expended, roll a d4. On a 4, one of the tusks falls out, decreasing the damage of the Jaw by 1d6.
When all tusks have fallen out, the Jaw becomes useless, and cannot be used in any capacity.
This large two handed weapon was wrenched from the body of a great Ogre Lord, torn unceremoniously from his loins after being killed in battle, and welded to perfection by the most unlicensed surgeons. Now it's in your hands, in all of its sweaty, girthy, slightly decaying glory.
The Ogre Dick functions as a +1 greatclub. On a hit, roll a d6. On a roll of 1 or 6, you hit with such ferocity that a bit of hot white secretion leaks out the tip of the club, dealing an additional 1d4 acid damage to the target. On a 1, the white secretion leaks down the shaft, causing damage to the weilder as well as to the target.
Arouses anyone the wearer touches (skin to skin contact), providing the wearer advantage on their next persuasion roll against the target, or disadvantage on the targets next save against being charmed by the person wearing the gloves. The gloves are always slightly damp.
Seashell of Poseidan
Common Shell Variety
Holding this item to your ear, you can hear the call of Poseidans domain.
Uncommon Shell Variety
Holding this item to your ear, you feel you can almost hear the call of Poseidan himself. Once per day, when you hold the item to your ear, roll a 1d100. On a roll of 10 or less, you are inspired by the godly voice, and gain advantage on your next ability check.
Socks of Dryness
Rare socks, cotten
Socks that, when worn, always keep the wearers feet warm and dry. It's like holding your feet up by a warm fireplace in the heart of winter. Aah.
Very Rare Coins
These two coins are always ready to give you their advice, even if it's unhelpful. What can they say, they're busybodies. The coins have 10 charges. You can expend a charge to ask them for help. When you do, roll a d6. On a roll of 5-6, the coins give marvelous advice and you gain advantage on your next ability check. On a roll of 1-4, their advice isn't quite as helpful as you'd like, and you have disadvantage on your next ability check.
The coins regain 1d6 charges after a long rest.
The Mirror of Elsharad
_Artifact, requires attunment _
The mirror of Elsharad is an ancient artifact, formed from the spirits of those who died innocently, before their time was up. It allows those attuned to it to see the dead trapped on the etheral plane. The mirror acts as a normal reflective surface, allowing you to peer into the ethereal plane as if you were standing there, but not allowing you to scry. Those not attuned to the mirror see it as a regular mirror, showing their own reflection.
The mirror is the size of a handmirror, made of twisting silver and inlaid with black gems that seem to swirl with color the more you look at them.
Speaking With the Dead
The person holding the mirror can communicate with the spirits they see in the ethereal plane. They appear as an astral projection, and can communicate for as long as they hold the mirror, for up to 1 hour. They must take a short rest before using the mirror in this fashion again.
Anything that can fit inside the mirrors surface can be passed into the ethereal plane, or back into the material plane if someone attuned to the mirror sticks their hand through to grab it.
Once per day, you can use the mirrors surface to scry somewhere in the ethereal plane. It works the same as the Scry spell.
Summon the Dead
Once a day, a spellcastor attuned to the mirror with a 4th level spell slot can use that slot to summon one of the dead from the mirror. They appear as a Ghost, and will follow the command of the summoner for 1d10 hours, before dissapearing back into the ethereal plane. It takes 3d10 days before the castor can use this ability again.
The castor has no power over which ghost is summoned.
Touch From the Grave
While attuned to this artifact, your skin is deathly cold, and deals 1d4 nectrotic damage to any living thing (plants or creatures) should your skin touch theirs directly.
Destroying the Mirror
The mirror can only be shattered by weapons with strong celestial properties. Even then, any remaining shards of the mirror act as if it was intact--excepting the Summon the Dead feature.
Being able to peer into the ethereal plane (and communicate with the dead) allows the adventurers to pick up a bunch of quests from those lost and wandering, or seeking retribution. Some of these could include...
- A woman who was beaten to death by her alcoholic husband while pregnant. She seeks retribution for her and her dead child.
- A goblin who never got to tell his friends how much they meant to it, and wants you to find its greatest treasure, and deliver it to the goblin camp.
- A vampire that died when it tried to drink blood from a construct. It would like you to repair some teeth and give it to them.
- A woman who died of heatstroke tending to her garden. She needs to see it flourish before she can attain peace.
- A man, tortured, begs you to take revenge on those who captured him.
- Raiders whose bodies have drifted since their ship was attacked. Many of its members died with it, and ask that you bring messages to those that survived, as well as get their treasure back from the creature that attacked them.
- The drow whose soul is trapped in the ethereal plane while a litch is possessing him in the real world.
- A town that got flooded, and is still underwater.
- A little girl who wants you to tell her dog how much she loved it.
Spork of the Zombie Apocolypse
Artifact, requires attunement
Long ago, a twisted and powerful necromancer was trying to maximize his efficency, particularly with his eating utensils. And so, the spork was created. But alas, it fell in a vat of a powerful magical serum the necromancer was working on while eating soup, and it was embued with the darkest and most twisted of necrotic magic. Now, anyone who is pierced with the weapon feels the tendrils of the dead seep through their skin, transforming them forever into a mindless abomination.
The Spork functions as a +3 dagger, and anytime a target is pierced by it, they must make a constitution save (DC 18) or be turned into a zombie. The Zombie takes its next action to turn, and has all the stats it did in life, except for its intelligence, which drops to 3. The Zombie also gains Undead Fortitutde (If damage reduces the zombie to 0 hit points, it must make a Constitution saving throw with a DC of 5+the damage taken, unless the damage is radiant or from a critical hit. On a success, the zombie drops to 1 hit point instead.), and immunity to Poison. Its max HP drops to half it had in life. If the zombies HP was lower than its new max, it regains HP to its new max.
The Spork has 5 charges. You may expend a charge to give a zombie you create an order, which it must obey. If it is a suicidal command, the zombie may succeed on a wisdom saving throw (DC 18) to disregard the command.
The spork regains 1d4 charges the first time it is touched by the full moon. It can only do this once per day.
While holding the Spork, there is always the chance that you could be harmed by it. Every time you attack with the Spork, roll 1d10. On a 10, you take 1d6 necrotic damage from handeling the sickly weapon.