## Oath of Horniness Being a paladin often means one must follow a certain set of expectations. What with being an embodiment of the ideals of justice and fairness and all, they are trusted to behave like what you’d expect of a paragon: showing no signs of weakness or flaw; having no desire; exercising self-restraint at all times. Any who do not follow this image are sure to be met with coercion from those around them. “There’s no place for a paladin like you.” There are, however, a rare few specimens who, when faced with this coercion, decide to stand tall instead. In defiance of the correctness forced upon them by the world, they swear an oath to live true to themselves; releasing their innermost desires without fear of shame or reprisal. With a hardened… resolve, these unusual warriors are determined to prove that their lust can be a force of good, just like any other virtue. ### Tenets of Horniness Though the exact words and strictures of the Oath of Horniness vary, paladins of this oath share these tenets. - ***Acceptance.*** It’s okay to be horny all the time. It’s part of who you are, and no one will ever get rid of it. - ***Flexibility.*** Any kinks are good, as long as they’re consensual. Anything can be enjoyable if the right conditions are met. - ***Dedication.*** Once you find your *Waifu*, you must always protect them; worship them; and praise them to the best of your ability. The *Waifu* is absolute, and you are their dutiful servant. - ***Respect.*** Whenever you look, you do so respectfully. It is all for the sake of appreciation. ### Oath Spells You gain oath spells at the paladin levels listed. ##### Oath of Horniness Spells | Paladin Level | Spell | |:----:|:-------------| | 3rd | *Grease, Gift of Alacrity*| | 5th | *Enlarge Reduce, Darkvision* | | 9th | *Galder’s Tower, Tongues* | | 13th | *Conjure Woodland Beings, Stoneskin* | | 17th | *Scrying, Dream* |

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### Channel Divinity When you take this oath at 3rd level, you gain the following two Channel Divinity options. *** **Enhanced Vigor**: When you heal another humanoid creature by any means other than nonmagical, you can imbue them with the power of your exceptional libido, reducing their exhaustion level by one point. If they don’t currently have exhaustion points, then their next short rest can be finished in one minute instead. *** **Simping Hours:** You devote yourself to a friendly creature you can see, temporarily becoming their white knight. For 1 minute, as long as you are within 5 feet of the affected creature, any attacks or spells which directly target it will be redirected to you instead. You have a bonus of +2 to your AC against these redirected threats. • You can end this effect on your turn as part of any other action. If you fall unconscious, this effect ends. ### Anti-Bonk Measures At 3rd level, you are always prepared for the incoming clobbering, holding your head high and the rest even higher. You have resistance to bludgeoning damage and can use your Charisma modifier instead of your Dexterity when determining your AC. This feature replaces *Divine Health*.

\page ### Aura of Horny Starting at 7th level, you and friendly creatures within 10 feet of you are horny at all times while you are conscious, gaining impure and often senseless thoughts with a higher frequency than normal. You all have disadvantage on saving throws to resist being charmed, but gain resistance to psychic damage and cannot be put to sleep by magic. At 18th level, the range of this aura increases to 30 feet. ### Step on Me, Mama! At 15th level, you are able to delight yourself in the caress of your assailants, being revitalized in the process. Choose any creature type: that becomes your *favoured type*. Whenever you receive damage dealt by a creature of your *favoured type*, you can use your reaction to regain a number of hit points equal to the same dice used for that damage roll. If you do so, for the next minute you also gain advantage on saving throws to resist the effects of spells cast by creatures not belonging to your *favoured type*. Once you use this feature, you can’t do so again until you finish a short or long rest. You can change your *favoured type* once every week. ``` ``` ### Blessing of the Waifu At 20th level, you may choose any creature you can see within 100 feet of you. It can be a party member, an NPC, an enemy, a Fiend, or even the BBEG. The specified creature then becomes your *Waifu*. While you are within 15 feet of your *Waifu*, you gain a +3 bonus to attack rolls, damage rolls, ability checks and saving throws; and cannot be charmed, frightened, or possessed. You can designate a new creature as your *Waifu* once per week. You can choose to have more than one *Waifu* at the same time, but the bonus doesn’t stack. Additionally, the range of the feature decreases to 10 feet, and you lose your immunity to the charmed condition.

##### Credit

***Artwork:*** *first page - background: David Pizarro; character: Hyun W Park, Kan Liu. second page - background: RainySoft; character: Nick Dodd*

***Watercolor:*** *Jared Ondricek,*

***Design:*** *u/CamunonZ*

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